After three months

I haven’t updated this blog for three months. I attempted to maintain a blog post each month. I have thoughts waiting to be written. Unfortunately, I will get distracted as soon as I logged in. Either one of my social media accounts will generate an interesting notification. I will remember a bill I need to settle online. A pending task needs to be accomplished. I feel too tired and sleepy to blog. The more prevalent excuse, I have nothing positive to share. I feel that I’m bound to make another sad and pathetic post. True enough, much of my sentiments still deal with my career struggles, financial concerns, and aging.

I’m trying to recall anything good that happened on the last two months. But as always, the negative events dominate me. Failed job applications, lost interest in job hunting, hopelessness on my current work, hiding behind an image of positivity and enthusiasm every time I teach, debts, people who took advantage, weight problems and lost friendships.

On the positive side, I discovered real friendships that surpassed the test of time, distance and other circumstances. I freed myself from a burdening investment. I’m still with my family. I remain healthy, even when I stepped on the border of obesity. If there’s any consolation with my worklife, my teaching life is good.

With all these experiences, I succumb to the idea of writing some realizations.

  1. Working hard will never be enough. Surviving the workplace entailed surviving a myriad of factors from doing your job well, moderating everyone’s behavior, or to make it simpler, how to play with politics.
  2. You don’t need to give Christmas presents to everyone. But I think I’ve overdone it this year. My excuse, I took the season as an opportunity to thank all the people, mostly colleagues, who helped me accomplished a significant project. I realised that being a good colleague throughout the year is more than enough Christmas gift. People easily forget material stuff. Being a good colleague will always go a long way.
  3. Apart from my immediate working environment, a lot of people / strangers helped me to have a better life throughout the year. The courteous, accommodating and helpful sales personnel I encountered made life better for me. While giving tips are great, I realised that non-monetary rewards also make as great commendations. Sending sincere commendations through customer service survey forms, customer feedback email, or even through the company’s social media accounts. Trust me, it will feel great from your end too.
  4. Part of growing means some of your support system being taken away. In simpler terms, losing friends after discovering their real intentions. Or sometimes, time and distance will change everything.
  5. I’m amazed with colleagues who seem to be loved by everyone. Over time though, I learned that having a few, real and trusted friends mattered more. It’s having people who will love you, even at your worst. Also, I’ve learned to admire colleagues who seem to have a small group of friends over time. They may alienate themselves most of the time, but their years of friendship is beyond amazing.
  6. Some people will always have the talent to make you feel bad. :p I don’t wan’t to further elaborate, but some people can effortlessly ruin our day.
  7. As I grow up, I realised that even the shallowest things can make me happy and feel loved. Handwritten notes, letters and the sincerest personal messages make me feel loved.
  8. Case in point, I think I’m reaching that stage when I don’t care much about gifts or presents. I prefer presence over presents. 🙂 A birthday cake, heart warming message and a hug is more than enough. But don’t get me wrong, I still value gifts because as they say, it’s the thought that counts. I still appreciate the fact that someone took time and effort to buy me a present. I guess more than the gift, I look forward for the sincerity and love that comes with it.
  9. This year, I’ve come to accept that I cannot immediately settle all the lousy debts and financial mess I made. It will entail a number of years to wipe out everything.
  10. I may not be financially stable but I can still enjoy life. There are always blessings that come along the way. I have other reasons to smile.

I guess this post will do for now. I wanted to write more but my thoughts are all scattered. Part of me wants to go to sleep, exercise to perspire and shake off this body ache.

It will be Christmas in a few more hours. Wishing everyone a blessed Christmas! I hope you are surrounded by all the love and warmth from your loved ones.


PS Shout out to John who took the time to email me for any update in my blog. 🙂 I used to believe that I’m the only person reading my blog. Hahaha