Sad Friday

I gained another reason to leave.

I have written my experiences with my documentation project here and here. The highlight of my 11 years in the company can be summarized in the outcome of that project. The Big Boss above heard my prayers. My project became a successful endeavor. The panel of assessors and the Highest Office in the Country gave my employer the award. We did it! On my silent times, I did it! This is one of the rare times that I can say to myself, I have done something good in my life.

I learned the great news last Monday. I was on leave ….. because I was called for a job interview. My Boss heard it from the Secretary of this responsible government agency. He received the great news through a phone call. I was not aware of the atmosphere at the workplace. He later called me and of all instances, I was on queue for interview. As much as I want to shout and share the happiness, I have to be discreet. I’m not sure how I sounded to him. I was whispering and was forced to contain my emotions.

When I reported for work the next day, I was expecting for a lighter and happier environment. We have received the greatest news we’ve been praying for. It surprised me, the atmosphere at work was just the same. Maybe I was expecting something. A little pat from the back or words of appreciation from my Big Boss…… at the last minute, even a text message of appreciation. There was nothing….

{I have to stop writing this post. I have to cry….}

I admit that I’m expecting something. Not a promotion or a raise. You bet, it will never happen. I was half wishing that I will receive anything from my Boss. But people change. And maybe, I can assume that he wasn’t having that overwhelming happiness.

You see, people have been congratulating my Boss. Being the Manager of the Year, he has again proven that he deserves the recognition. But you see, behind him (modesty aside) I can always claim that I was part of his success. I was never expecting him to acknowledge me in front of other people. Not my thing…. I’m fine with a little words of gratitude expressed in the most discrete way. Unfortunately, there was nothing.

I never expected to receive the most awaited news this way. Months and almost a year ago, I was looking forward for this accomplishment. This was my dream for the company. When it finally happened, I never imagined to feel more shattered and broken.

I have to stop writing this post… I’ll have my first class tomorrow and I’m afraid, I don’t want to start another school year with swollen eyes.

2 thoughts on “Sad Friday

  1. Totoong nakakasama ng loob. Pero hayaan mo na lang Sis dahil kung hindi man ngayon mabigyan ng kapalit yung mga pinaghirapan mo, darating din ang araw at lahat ng magagandang bunga nyan ay mapapasayo. ^_^

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