My current working schedule is way better than the previous semester . I handle two consecutive classes in the morning and my remaining hours are spent for my office work. I love the fact that I can go home early. No more evening exhausting evening classes. Just when I was about to start office work, I learned that two of my colleagues are tendering their resignation. One will study abroad and the other will pursue her dream of pursuing a career in the industrial sector. Sigh… Here we go again. I’m not friends with these colleagues. No personal relationships but why am I affected? It’s not that I will miss them. We’re never friends. But something has intensified in me again.
People are leaving and I’m being left behind. What now for me? I’m beginning to feel that I’m left in the flock of losers.
As I was beginning to over analyse things again, the following thoughts dawned to me
1. I admire people who are willing to accept lower salaries in another company – In exchange for more possibilities of career growth, this colleague admitted that she is very willing to accept a lower salary to start and build her career in the corporate sector. This will never work for me. My New Journey Series will explain. I have a new insurance policy and I need to build my savings account.
2. I fear the uncertainty – If I move to a new company, I fear the new boss and colleagues to deal with. For sure, there are patience testing experiences again.
3. I don’t want to leave my job just because everyone is leaving – I don’t want to appear as someone who only joins the trend. When I will tender that resignation, I want to do it because I’m convinced that it is the best decision for me.
4. It’s hard to leave a very understanding Boss – This has been one of my greatest struggles. My current Boss is highly respected in the company. He has led successful projects. He is best known for being one of most considerate and understanding superiors in the workplace. How can you give up the best?
5. My recent conversation with my Mother – I told her last weekend that I’m already having second thoughts of transferring to another company. I also advised her that I would most likely land on a BPO company that requires graveyard shift. These BPOs are surviving the employment market of the Philippines. You know, the classic stories of American and European companies who transferred bulk of their operations to Asian economies to avail of cheaper operations costs. After explaining this situation, my Mother encouraged me to remain where I am. Magtiyaga ka na anak sa ______, kesa naman sa gabi ka magtrabaho. Ikakamatay mo pa ‘yan. Mapapadali ang buhay mo nyan. I can’t blame her. I have a friend who works for a contact centre and later found her health deteriorating. After 3 years of working, she passed away. Months after, I learned that one of my friend’s colleagues also passed away, same reason accounted.
6. I’m halfway writing this post when I realised that it was already lunch time. I left my table for a while and purchased my lunch. As I was returning to the office, a colleague behind me blurted… mag-isa ka na lang ngayon, wala na yung kasama mo mag-lunch. Good thing another colleague approached him I almost want to say, SH@#$% you don’t need to emphasise it. I KNOW ! I KNOW! I know better because I was able to find a best friend for 10 years at the workplace. And you? Look at you, you have been eating lunches on your own for more than 15 years. I can’t imagine how miserable is the workplace for you.
I’m more confused now. Or maybe, I already have a decision it’s just that I’m refusing to accept and face it.