A few weeks ago, I met some of my blog friends. It was my first time to meet someone I knew online. More than excitement, I felt a bit nervous of meeting them because the truth is I’m a painfully shy person. I may appear so talkative here but deep inside, I’m rather quiet and reserved.
During our meet up, Kelley, being the oldest in the group, facilitated our exchange of discussions. Kelley could already be my mother actually. Of the many things we talked about, one question remained with me until today. Kelley posted this question to me and Janelle,
What do you want to say to your 20-year old self?
I admit, it was hard to answer this question on the spot. It almost felt like participating in a impromptu speaking contest. My answer was
“Don’t worry too much. Things will be fine.”
Allow me first to recall my life when I was still 20. At that time, I’m about to finish school. It was my last year in college. I had my equal share of good and bad times in college. Of the bad times, I always hated the way I look. Yes I was insecure of my physical appearance and honestly, until today. I struggled with my Statistics and other major subjects but I was able surpass everything. Of the good times, my college years will always be special because it was only during those times when I learned how it felt to excel in school. I gave my parents more than enough headaches in my Elementary and High School days. School then for me meant my own heavy cross to carry.
At 20, I was savoring my last year in college. I started my job applications, I’m beginning to feel that I will graduate will honors and in God’s grace, I did.
If given the chance to rewrite my answer to such question, I also wanted to tell my 20-year old self to start writing, set and list down your dreams and ambitions, and value friendships that are about to fade away.
Start writing – The interest to write has been with me since I was 12 years old. When I was in college, I became too preoccupied and totally set aside the interest. In my college years, there were already a few sites that provide blogging opportunities. I was aware but I never bought the idea. If only we could turn back time, I wanted to tell myself to start blogging and savor the freedom it can provide.
List down your dreams and ambitions – I was never a totally organized person. I wanted system and order but most of the time, things always appear the opposite. While other people would identify their goals and set a time table for each, I never became that person. I wanted things to work that way but in reality, I’m lazy and I simply go with the flow. As an evidence to this, some of my humbled accomplishments always appeared as one of life’s unexpected yet welcomed surprises.
Value friendships – If not because of Facebook, I would totally lost reach to my college friends. At some point, I became a loner in my college days as well. I forced myself to small groups of my classmates. As I age, I realized that in the case of friendship, what matters more is what you do today. The past carries traces of good and bad memories. There’s nothing I can do to alter them. Over time, I learned that in the case of friendship, what rather matters is what you do today and how much efforts are you willing to give to rekindle that friendship.